Welcome to the second edition of my Memoirs of an Empty Nester blog. Here, I share all the mistakes I’ve made, and subsequent lessons I’ve learned, since both kids left for college. Today’s lesson caught me off guard. If someone would have given me a blank sheet of paper when I was a young man and asked me to compile a list of all possible ways I could get in trouble with my future wife, I would have been able to fill out that paper front and back, single-spaced, and then asked for a second sheet of paper to continue. What can I say? I’m an overachiever. And since I became a husband in 1997, I’ve been in trouble with my wife way more times than would fill a sheet of paper. And most, if not all these infractions, were indeed my fault.

However, I recently got into trouble after my wife and I became empty nesters and then got into even more trouble because I did not recognize the error of my ways. I hope some husbands or boyfriends can relate, because you know, misery loves company. Anyway, here’s what happened. I watched a show on Amazon Prime. And just like that…I’m the bad guy! Okay, there may be a little more to the story. I watched an episode of the new series, Reacher. Okay, I watched an episode of the new series, Reacher, without my wife. Alright, I watched an episode of the new series, Reacher, without my wife after she specifically asked me not to.

But in my defense, she wasn’t home and I really wanted to see what happened next. So I hit play and watched Jack Reacher beat up bad guys for 45 minutes. Then came my turn to get beat up. My wife Angie was not happy that I did not wait for her. Then she was even agrier when I told her it was no big deal and that I would watch it a second time with her. In my mind, no harm, no foul. In her mind, we lost precious time together. According to her, watching a show together is just not the same when one person knows every move about to happen or line about to be delivered. No wonder she hates watching any 80s comedy movie with me.

To Angie, watching this show with one another was all about spending quality time together. At the end of the day, time is our most valuable commodity. Our time is the greatest gift we can give anyone because it’s impossible to ever get these moments back. When we deliberately give our time to others, we are expressing to them that, at that instant, there is nobody else more important and our time is devoted completely to them.

Honor your significant other with the gift of your time and the gift of your presence. Everything else is secondary. Now that our kids are gone, and we are empty nesters, I understand the importance of time spent with those you love even more.